Horror stories lend themselves to being ingested in bite-sized nuggets, which means they are a perfect source for anthology films, which means Scare Package sounds very appealing, which means I want to see it as soon as possible.
Shudder has acquired all rights in its territories to the horror-comedy anthology and will premiere the film on its streaming service in the U.S., Canada, and the UK on June 18, 2020, which means that I have declared June 18 to be Scary Candy Day! (Not to be confused with National Fudge Day two days before that, on June 16.)
The official synopsis reveals: "In Scare Package, Chad, the owner of Rad Chad's Horror Emporium, recounts a series of bone-chilling, blood-splattered tales to illustrate the rules of the horror genre to his newest employee. Each story takes aim at different tropes, paying homage to and subverting the timeless clichés of the beloved genre with a cast that includes Noah Segan (Knives Out), Baron Vaughn (Mystery Science Theater 3000) Chase Williamson (Beyond the Gates), Jocelyn DeBoer (Greener Grass), Jeremy King (Camera Obscura), wrestling legend Dustin Rhodes, Toni Trucks (SEAL Team), Hawn Tran (Watchmen) and more.
"Led by a diverse group of up-and-coming genre filmmakers, Scare Package features the directorial debuts of actors Segan and Vaughn. Emily Hagins (Netflix's Coin Heist), Anthony Cousins (The Bloody Ballad of Squirt Reynolds), Chris McInroy (Bad Guy #2, Death Metal), Courtney and Hillary Andujar (Production Designers of The Girl On The Third Floor, Bloodline), and Aaron B. Koontz (Camera Obscura, the upcoming The Pale Door) round out the collection of filmmakers."
Aaron B. Koontz and Cameron Burns are credited as the creators. When watching the trailer below, be aware that it includes material that may be considered NSFW, especially if young, impressionable children are within viewing range. (Unless, of course, you want to possibly scar them for life!) Then mark June 18 in your calendar for the film's streaming debut.