Have Your Say: What's The Worst Tagline You've Ever Seen?

Associate Editor, Features; Rotterdam, The Netherlands (@ardvark23)
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Have Your Say: What's The Worst Tagline You've Ever Seen?
You know how it goes: you're strolling through the city, or you're waiting for public transportation... either way you're with friends, family or colleagues, and the conversation shifts to the huge movie poster you all just walked past. This happened to me this weekend, and the poster's movie was Christopher Nolan's upcoming war drama Dunkirk.

And what were we discussing? The tagline. As seen above, the otherwise perfectly serviceable Dunkirk poster sports the following tagline: "The Event That Shaped Our World". And the discussion quickly became hilarious.

HYS-dunkirk-poster.jpgChaos theory came up, which states the huge effects even the flapping of a butterfly's wings have on the entire world (and indeed universe) some time later. Literally every single event shapes our world, making the tagline a distinct non-statement.

Also, an "event"? Can you be any less descriptive when talking about the huge, grueling and terrifying evacuation which took place in Dunkirk at the start of the second World War? Even a simple "Try To Get Out" would be better.

I was tempted to have this article be about trying to find a better tagline for Dunkirk, but I don't like poking fun at the publishers and marketeers, especially because I don't know the perimeters they had to work within. For all I know their hands and feet were tied with a multitude of rules, like "Don't make it too depressing", "Don't mention it's not about a battle we won", "Make sure people know it's about something huge but don't tell them what". Stuff like that.

It's a bit of a shame though because I do really like that poster, and now the only talk we had was about a tagline which was rather "meh..."

And it is not even the worst tagline ever, I mean I can easily think of some total clunkers...

Now THERE is a fun question-of-the-week: what is the worst tagline on a movie poster you've ever seen?

Chime in, in the comments below, and HAVE YOUR SAY!
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More about Have Your Say

ManateeAdvocateJune 27, 2017 12:03 PM

Oh, that's an easy one for me.

"Crime is a disease. Meet the cure."

Even as a child I rolled my eyes. I had fun with the movie as a kid, but YIKES.

Ard VijnJune 27, 2017 12:22 PM

My favorite bad one is from SUSPIRIA: "The Only Thing More Terrifying Than the Last 12 Minutes Of This Film Are The First 92". What, you mean the film ends with an anti-climax?!

Todd BrownJune 27, 2017 1:23 PM

COBRA!

omnisemantic1June 27, 2017 1:49 PM
The Bearded ClownJune 27, 2017 7:15 PM

"Don't Judge a Cop by His Cover"
From this years Sleepless. Still better than the film.

Michael LangJune 27, 2017 9:50 PM

This "article" was written by someome who does not understand history. A Millenial no doubt.

One-EyeJune 27, 2017 11:20 PM

Any variation on the hacky "Some (insert noun) should never be (insert verb)..."

wagnerfilmJune 28, 2017 12:37 AM

I'm old enough to remember the days when studios hadn't yet worked out the art and science of good taglines, and you would see movie posters with literally paragraph-long text blocks, often two or three, just flat-out *explaining* the plot of the movie to you in detail. I'm guessing they were taking their cues from the back covers of paperback books or something.

wagnerfilmJune 28, 2017 12:38 AM

Oh, that's awful. Pity too, because I really like the movie.

wagnerfilmJune 28, 2017 12:44 AM

Not sure what you mean, and I'm not sure you know what you mean either, and were just looking for a clever crack to make about Millennials. Two n's, by the way.

While it's almost certain that Dunkirk "shaped our world" to a greater degree than some flitting butterfly, the article is actually on point: it's an empty tagline. It doesn't say anything of substance. And to think of Dunkirk as "THE" event that shaped our world? More than D-Day or Hiroshima? History, in fact, is full of millions of world-shaping events. Because that's what history is: the record of events that shaped the world.

The article in fact understands that. I'm curious to know what you think you understand.

omnisemantic1June 28, 2017 3:59 AM

Lol Ard, some clown tried to call you a millennial and couldn't understand a straightforward paragraph of text xD

Hmm, wanna bet about the exact nature of this clown?

*Disqus profile reveals a crazy American obsessed with calling those on the political left "fascists" and who probably sees movies only if they play them on FOX News*

Did your grandpa die hauling ass from Dunkirk, boy? Do you think YOU understand history? Should we care? Nah...

KurtJune 28, 2017 8:50 AM

"Evil has a Flight Plan." - All i can imagine is that 'EVIL' is standing in an Airport looking at the giant screen trying to determine if his connecting flight is going to depart on time, then sitting down and waiting for a boarding call.

cjohnstonJune 28, 2017 1:45 PM

Likewise - a Fav. of mine as well.
~
Glass half empty/ ..half full ~ but That, and Dead Man Down; are my favorites of his.
..and Darn Good features to boot..

cjohnstonJune 28, 2017 1:46 PM

at this point in time - ANYthing with the words "planet", "apes", and(or) "transformers" in it make me want to Hope on a one-way ticket to Jupiter..

Ard VijnJune 28, 2017 9:13 PM

OUCH.

Ard VijnJune 28, 2017 9:14 PM

Oh come on, when I was 16 this was a bloody awesome tagline!
I was more offended with the COBRA poster clearly plagiarizing the TERMINATOR poster.

Ard VijnJune 28, 2017 9:18 PM

Do explain? Is the film not about the huge, gruelling and terrifying evacuation which took place in Dunkirk at the start of the second World War? You're not one of those people who think this is about D-day I hope?

Ard VijnJune 28, 2017 9:22 PM

Well, at the very least he's got my age wrong already. Kids these days...

ManateeAdvocateJune 29, 2017 7:33 AM

You're killing me.
Back when Sly and Arnie were "fighting" for the top.

ManateeAdvocateJune 29, 2017 7:36 AM

Are you a high school graduate?

Michael LangJune 29, 2017 10:43 AM

Masters Degree pinhead....what about you. Grade school?

ManateeAdvocateJune 29, 2017 11:00 AM

Masters Degree in Health Sciences. So now what?

Michael LangJune 29, 2017 2:16 PM

MFA - New York University Graduate Film. Something you never did ....did you? Rather pthetic are you not. Sad.

ManateeAdvocateJune 29, 2017 2:20 PM

Duke University School of Medicine, but you're extremely boring at this point. Bye.

ManateeAdvocateJune 29, 2017 2:25 PM

Yikes. I did just look at this tool's profile. He clearly loves throwing around the 'pinhead' insult. Thankfully there's a block function.

Michael LangJune 29, 2017 2:28 PM

Wooooo....so impressive...not. Admit it it is more like the Peoria Community College....no lying now clown. Where do you clowns come from? So sad.

ErnestoJune 29, 2017 4:28 PM

"Slam Evil" or "Chip Happens" are the only two I can think of at the moment.