THE THING Review

Full disclosure: John Carpenter's The Thing is one of my favorite movies of all time. I also have a great deal of respect for "Who Goes There?," the original story by John W. Campbell, Jr., and believe that The Thing From Another World, directed by Christian Nyby and/or Howard Hawks, is well-made and a good deal of fun. Each stands on its own, each reflects a strong creative vision, and each is a product of its time.

Nonetheless, I was fully prepared to follow the new version of The Thing, directed by Matthijs van Heijningen Jr., as it charted its own distinctive course. The film's biggest problem, it turns out, is not that it fails to reach the heights established by its predecessors -- it doesn't come close -- but that it doesn't even live up to its own potential.

Eric Heisserer's script starts things off with a good dirty joke told in Norwegian, which would seem to indicate the desired tone: less serious, more jocular. As the story develops, it becomes clear that the filmmakers are, indeed, more interested in crafting an action-packed creature feature, more akin to an updated version of the 1951 edition, rather than something like Carpenter's dark, almost nihilistic 1982 take on the material.

That would be fine if the new version established its own identity. But the tone is tossed hither and thither, losing its jocularity when the full extent of the danger posed by the reawakened alien creature becomes known, and settling in for a long, sober fight for life that holds few surprises. The craftsmanship needed for a muscular action picture is missing; the set pieces are extremely limited -- creature appears, followed by yelling and screaming, and then either CGI'd body horror or bursts of flames setting tiny rooms on fire -- and they're staged and shot in very conventional fashion.

Absent much atmosphere, awash in lackadaisical characters, and structured far too loosely to be mistaken for a suspense thriller, The Thing becomes reliant on "jump" moments -- always emphasized by a sudden rise in volume and an appropriately discordant music cue by composer Marco Beltrami. There's no unease or shock when a beloved character's life is put in jeopardy, because it's the only thing the filmmakers can do to keep the action moving forward to its preordained conclusion.

Also, it's hard to love these characters, despite the generally high quality of the cast members. Mary Elizabeth Winstead has the lead role as Kate Lloyd, a paleontologist recruited by renowned scientist Dr. Sander Halvorson (Ulrich Thomsen) to accompany him on a trip to the Antarctic in the winter of 1982. Three other Americans -- played by Joel Edgerton, Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje, and Eric Christian Olsen -- are aboard a helicopter to the Norwegian base camp, near where a strange aircraft, thought to be of alien origin, has been discovered.

The Norwegians, under the leadership of Edvard Wolner (Trond Espen Seim), are a rambunctious bunch, ready to celebrate when Sander declares that a strange creature found frozen in the ice is an alien being from outer space. The party dies when the creature somehow comes to life and starts attacking the men. And it's in the initial attack scenes that any possibility of suspense is tossed aside: The creature simply appears and attacks. (Repeat.)

The film pays lip service to Carpenter, featuring all manner of minor fan service to ensure that, as a "prequel," it will fit neatly into the narrative to follow. That makes the story it tells feel even more schematic, moving around chess pieces randomly, knowing where they will end up. There are some moments that hint at what might have been: a creative new "test" to determine who's an alien and who's still human; a bi-lingual stand-off between the Norwegians and the Americans that suggests cultural differences could, and should have, played a bigger role in introducing some much-needed drama.

Winstead is an exceedingly winsome actress, but it's hard to know what to make of Kate Lloyd. She starts out passive and frustrated, rebuffed sternly by Sandor in her attempts to proceed with caution. She calls to mind Sigourney Weaver's portrayal of Ripley in the first half of Alien, a woman with a measure of authority who everyone ignores. Kate Lloyd then moves to center stage, as her theories prove correct and she grows in command. But then, sadly, the character kind of blands out, even while she's wielding a flamethrower. It is, perhaps, a brave choice to dial down her burgeoning kick-ass nature right at the moment when it might have shifted the movie into a more urgent gear, yet it contributes to a general feeling of lassitude in the third act.

With all that being said, I didn't hate the 2011 version of The Thing. After all, it's not really worth getting too angry about something that will fade from memory so quickly.

The Thing opens wide across the U.S. today. Check local listings for theaters and showtimes.